Part 19 - Ramblings and My Life

Been a month since last entry. Weeks have been pretty much the same. Movies - Exercise - Shopping, got some new tops that everyone likes. Some even help show off my little titties. A D cup not that big on someone my size. Got me a pair of sandals for the summer. Never really liked them before, but my black sneakers are not very feminine and I can show off my painted toes.

I was having arm muscle spasms for a couple of weeks. Slows me down at times. Ah the benefits of old age creeping up.

Cracked a couple corners on a back molar. Gonna get a cap. Ceramic is $400 vs Gold $700, and that is my co-pay after insurance. When I got 3 Gold ones in late 90s, they were about 200-300 each.

Goofed up on my TAX estimates, owed about $3000.

In anticipation, I have been practicing with butt plugs. Have been using one 4x4 with no problem. Decided to move up to a 6x6 one. Wow first time it popped past the sphincter it hurt. 2nd time I really worked the smaller one, and inserted the bigger and worked it for a while. Even slept with it in for a while. Guess I will need to get a longer one next.

Only way I can get an orgasm is with prostate massage. Sorry state of affairs. Vaginal and Clitoral stimulation don't seem to work on their own anymore. New this may happen eventually when I went with my changes.

Things have been very chaotic here on NBN this last month.

Georgette

Part 18 - Ramblings

Well the last week has been pretty much the same. NO movie,just groceries on MON. Went to Fitness Center TUE-THU.

FRI, had a get together of like minded people. Some different from last time. This group is mostly Trans*Women. A new girl, about 18 and still in HS. She is just starting out, has not told whole family yet. She is going to be a real looker, nice facial features, nice thin body, and shoulder length thick hair. Getting ready for college. Oh to be young and fresh face 18. Of course I didn't have all that going for me. I have to learn a whole new language, we didn't have all this support stuff back then.

Went for late dinner at a Diner. Told jokes and other stuff till 1AM.

SAT, started to clean up the yard, getting ready for 1st grass mowing this week.

Also worked on the van I inherited. She used to keep a trickle charger on it. Took that off when I went to FL. Started it once in JAN, and let it sit. Checked it and battery was dead-dead. Put a charger on it for couple hours. Still no start but interior lights came on. Had to pull my car out and ran jumpers. Still NO start, had to let my car run for 1/2 hour, got it started. Ran it for 15 mins. Stopped van, could not restart. Guess I will have to work on it again MON. Hate cars when they don't want to work. And I need to get into the Mustang, and see if I can get it working. Don't think it was out of garage last year. I will keep van for hauling stuff, sell or trade in the Mustang. Don't need 3 vehicles. If anyone on East coast looking for a 1989 Mustang LX with the 5.0 liter option. She converted it to R134 air conditioner. Good car to soup up for a street racer.

SUN, went to a different group in afternoon. This group has about 5 Trans*Men. Boy if we could just change bodies, everyone would be happy. One of the Trans*Men was saying when he had his TOP surgery, he was so glad to get rid of them. Some have problems if they are larger breasted. Binding them doesn't always work well. I am so glad all that is behind me. Course now I have old people stuff creeping up. Guess I will have to talk with doctor about if I need to get prostate checked out. Had an uncle, not blood, who died in his 70s from that.

Guess MON I will go to a movie and groceries. And more working out TUE-THU. Should get some 1-1 this week to target some body areas.

Georgette

Part 17 - Ramblings

Went to the fitness center on the 9th. Changed my routine a little. Tried some of the weight machines.

Went to the center on the 10th. Started with the treadmill, got me breathing hard and heart rate up. Did 3-4 different sets on the bicycles. No elliptical. Really checked out the weight machines. Worked on my biceps-triceps-shoulders-chest-delts-lats-low back muscles. Boy my muscles got a workout. Some of the machines are a little uncomfortable with boobs. Today my chest/shoulders are a little tight.

With all this exercising, haven't bothered with any fancy dress up. Wearing 2-3 panties a day with all that sweating.

Getting ready for bed, and Brenda starts to play around. She put up some new pics/changed profile pic. Now I can't fall asleep until 2-3. Start waking at 5 or so, can't really fall back to sleep, got up around 9. Hate when this happens. Brenda can get pretty cocky in pink. Been in a fog all morning/afternoon. Too lazy to even get dressed. NO exercise today or tomorrow.

Listened to JS Bach, violin sonatas/concertos, helps to concentrate. Decided to make a Desktop Background Theme of my own. Helps to get my mind working, to do something different. Only about a dozen so far. Even included some from NGN. I do like both. Now I have that to tease/torture myself.

Hope to get some sleep tonight. Not that it makes any difference. Nothing going on for the weekend. Might take a shower and do some groceries, just to get out of the house. Maybe take some new pics.

Georgette

Part 16 - Ramblings

Yesterday was just another movie/groceries type day. Saw that Furious 7 movie. Wild driving stunts, and a sendoff to Paul Walker in the end. BUT I finally got off my ass and signed up at a fitness center. Trying to lose weight and need to get my aerobics and flabbiness worked out. Doctor has pestered me all the time about same.

Today I actually went to same center. Wore my tight leggings a bra and tank top over that. No-one looked at me funny, so I guess I just look like another fat woman. 10 mins on treadmill - 10 mins on lay back bicycle - 10 mins on sitting bicycle - 5 mins on some crazy step back and forth with crazy arm action machine. Even did some workout on a leg thigh lift weight machine.

After all that I was breathing hard and fast. My legs felt all weird. Relaxed between each as I was getting light headed. Relaxed before going home. Drive a standard clutch and wanted to make sure my legs didn't cramp up.

Hope to do more tomorrow. My bra was cutting into my ribs on the sides, and rubbed my skin raw. Some of us have to wear a bra, can't have the girls bouncing all over the place.

Georgette

Part 15 - Ramblings

Nice day today. Nothing big going on since last time. The usual movies/shopping/restaurant. Decided to splurge at restaurant Saturday. Had about 2-3 dozen muscles in Garlic/Wine/Butter sauce. Love to soak up the sauce with hard bread. Haven't had that much garlic in a while. Had a Steak with a mushroom Marsala sauce. Had Cavatappi pasta with a spicy Marinara sauce as a side. NO desert after all that. My mouth had such a happy time.

Got out and about today. Got more driving time in my 4 in heels. No stockings, so I could show off my dark red toes. Went to a group meeting of like minded people. Small group, so we had more one on one talk. A friend Trans got her new job, as a Foreign Service Officer. Starts her training in May. They were holding up her Security Clearance.

We talked about how the Trans people get the short shrift, in the LGBT crowd. Employment is terrible for Trans people.

Got a good messy burger, two 1/4 patties with cheese/lettuce/mustard/pickles/onions/green peppers, and good greasy fries, served in a brown paper bag, for dinner. I guess I will have to starve the rest of the week to make up for my weekend.

This has made me happier then usual. Also instead of listening to heavy metal. I switched to JS Bach, for the last few days. Organ music/Trio organ Sonatas/Harpsichord Keyboard Concertos. Requires you to really listen. Love to listen the different harmonics, and keyboard action.

I need to do this more often. A lot better then moping around.

Took some pics in my Black/White styles today. Love how they hug my bust, and with the a line skirt. Looks like I actually have some shape again. Have a lot of old jeans/tops cleaned and packed away. Went from a sz 28 to a sz 22 waist. I can only go down to a sz 24 top, until I lose more chest fat. Never want to go back up to that size again. Down to about 270 from over 300 6-12 months ago.

Sent pics off to my sister, she thought the dress was great, loved the jewelry. I stopped wearing rings/bracelets because of work. Years ago I welded a ring in to a HI Amp power supply. Good way to get electric burns.

Georgette

Part 14 - Ramblings and Life

Today pretty good, clear, sunny, cool, not too windy.

Went to Movies. Stopped at Carmax and Ford dealer. I inherited 2 vehicles from my partner. 1 a 94 Ford van conversion, not great shape, but keep it for hauling stuff. 1 a 89 Mustang LX w/5 liter option. Pretty good V-8 in 89. We converted it to r-134 air conditioning. Seems like everyone wants to see it for pricing. Figure on trading it and my 2010 Mustang, for a new 2015 sometime this year.

Saw a television show today, where a witness didn't come forward because he was gay. Said his family would probably dis-own him. Made me think of all the hidden things we don't tell people. I had to come out to my family to transition. After all it was not something to be able to hide. But never really discussed my sexual preferences. I wonder how many of us do the same, tell some things or none. Easier to hide Lesbian Gay or Bi. Not that it is most people's need to know.

Checked out the Chat Room stuff, to see how it works. I guess one of these days, I need to get a camera for my PC.

Georgette

Part 13 - Ramblings and life

My knee seems to be holding up. But it is starting to show bruising.

Went to movie and some clothes shopping today. Got myself a small clutch bag to hold my essentials. Skinnier pants, can't just jam stuff in pockets. Got a pair of jeggings, they are like leggings in fit, but are jeans.

When I did my autobiography for the doctors. I had stuff in there I remembered back then, but put away in my mind. I had stuff in there from when I was in kindergarten. About 4-5 yrs old. NOV birth, so I was always a 1/2 yr younger then most. I think nowadays they make you wait the extra 1/2 year. I guess even then I would play with the girls, and was very protective of them. And get in trouble with them. After reading about stuff like that, it jogged my memory.

As a coping mechanism back then, one learns to play well with the boys. Plus most of the kids in our neighborhood were boys. Not many girls, at least around my age.

Georgette

Part 12 - Ramblings and Life

Didn't go anywhere today. Give my knee a rest.

Thought I was OK, after my fall yesterday, till I took my leggings off for bed. Apparently I scuffed my knee all up. Lots of scraps some blood, but not too much blood. In the morning, knee didn't swell so that is good. Too early for bruising. Dressed up later, with stockings and 4 in heels. Looks like my knee will survive.

Went thru some old paperwork. I forgot all the problems I went thru in 1976-1977.

Re-read my psych doctor letters. I had to visit twice, 1 as male and 1 as female. He said I was totally at ease as Female, and terrible as Male. Hell I knew that, but doctors are doctors.

The name change was the easiest. We found an attorney that did all the paperwork. After name change, got the new company ID in NOV 76, see previous pic. Does that look like a male, but rules is rules.

Still worked as a male, kinda incongruous, but company went by legal stuff. Lived my life as Female outside of work. Had to send many letters to doctors, arguing that the company was all aboard but wouldn't let me work as female till surgery. Finally got doctors to commit, then work relented and allowed me to work as female, in MAR 77. Went for surgery in SEP 77.

I guess I put all that to bed, and filed all my paperwork away. I must have been a mental mess. Oh well, all's well that ends well. I don't even remember all that.

One has to be committed to put up with all that crap. Not the easiest in 1976. No support groups. Had to educate doctors on hormone therapy at times. My first Gynecologist was a newbie on TSs. I understand a lot has changed since then.

Still not sure if I should mention my rather short and boring try at a sex life. Or if any one wants to hear about my actual hospital stay and surgery. Please leave comments, if any are interested. Or send me a pm, I will try to educate any or all.

Georgette

Part 11 - Ramblings

Well weather was a bust today. Can't really go strutting my stuff in wet.

Just doing mundane stuff today.

Put my new shoes on to get mail. Break them in and get the balance on them. OK till I went to get the newspaper off the ground. With my wonky knee, I can't do a graceful squat. I would kinda spread my legs, can't do that in a skirt. So I tried to do a short squat, and lost my balance. With my size it shifts to the front. Landed on the ground, and with nothing to hold on to, couldn't get up. Tried twice and couldn't push my weight back. Must have looked weird, splayed on the ground. Had to take my shoes off, so I had a flat foot, to push up from. Have to find a better way to get stuff low to the ground.

Got a call from my sister, Her and my father were out for dinner. My father, 90, just starts to repeat himself. They were having wet weather also. This is their normal dry season. Both my sister and her husband are having back problems. Asked her what are they going to do when they get old like me.

Georgette

Part 10 - Ramblings

Well today turned out better in the afternoon. Sun came out and temp went in the hi 70s. So I decided to take a drive into town. Had mail to deliver.

Stopped at doctor office, to have a prescription called in. Also talk to doctor on my cholesterol medication. Last OCT/NOV had these weird arm muscle pains. Doctor said it was related to taking Statin drugs. Stopped them, and changed to a different one. Pain went away after a few weeks. Could hardly sleep, normal OTC pain stuff did nothing. Well here I am again, last week started to have the arm pains again. Stopped current medication, and the pains are going away. Doctor is seeing what else to do.

Went to get lunch, a double meat Reuben sandwich, and a Jamoca shake. Love Reubens. Gave me a bloated stomach all afternoon. I guess all the not eating much, has changed my stomach, couldn't handle it. House got up to 80s, on its own, guess spring is coming.

Stopped for some groceries, milk & some Brie cheese, and a few other things. Love to munch on outside moldy cheese and crackers for a snack. Can't stand the Blue and Green moldy cheeses, taste like soap to me. My partner was the opposite. Even got a new Limburger, love the stinky cheeses. My uncle got me started on that. After a night out doing things. We would make Limburger and Raw hamburger and onion on rye bread sandwiches. This was back in 1968-69 before I went into the Navy. Now, heaven forbid you have raw hamburger.

Got some new clothes and stuff in the mail. Like to do on-line after I figure the sizing. Got a top, black lace over a nude color inner lining. I love the way it hugs my breasts but makes me look pregnant. That's the problem with my belly. Got a new pair of shoes, strappy looking with bigger round high heel, with open toes of course, to show off the painted toes. May be perfect as a casual look with jeans. Also got two clutch type purses. Not a fan of regular style purses. Need something to carry the bare essentials, skinny jean pockets are not made to carry much. Need some longer tops to go with leggings. Need to cover my belly and butt. They feel so weird, like wearing just pantyhose.

Haven't been doing much fancy dress up lately. Just relaxing and stuff. Catching up on my television watching. Hopefully tomorrow will be a movie day, if weather holds up.

All this sitting and working at the computer, I now smoke at least two cigars a day. Started cigars when I was about 12-13. Shoplifted some, and we had to smoke them. Pretty much gave up on cigarettes. In the Navy, on submarines, I would smoke non-filter camels. At least they had some taste, but would end up with yellow finger tips.

Georgette